IELTS Writing Task 2 - Topic Animals #2

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Viết về chủ đề sau:
 

Examine the arguments in favour of and against animal experiments, and come to a conclusion on this issue.
 

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

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Issues related to experimentation are frequently discussed these days, particularly in the media. It is often said that animals should not be used in testing because it is cruel and unnecessary.  This essay will examine the arguments for and against animal testing.
 

On the one hand, the people who support these experiments say that we must do tests on animals.  For instance, many famous lifesaving drugs were invented in this way, and animal experiments may help us to find more cures in the future. Indeed, possibly even a cure for cancer and AIDS.  Furthermore, the animals which are used are not usually wild but are bred especially for experiments. Therefore, they believe it is not true that animal experiments are responsible for reducing the number of wild animals on the planet.
 

On the other hand, others feel that there are good arguments against this.  First and foremost, animal experiments are unkind and cause animals a lot of pain. In addition, they feel that many tests are not really important, and in fact animals are not only used to test new medicines but also new cosmetics, which could be tested on  instead.  Another issue is that sometimes an experiment on animals gives us the wrong result because animals’ bodies are not exactly the same as our own. As a consequence, this testing may not be providing the safety that its proponents claim.
 

In conclusion, I am of the opinion, on balance, that the benefits do not outweigh the disadvantages, and testing on animals should not continue.  Although it may improve the lives of humans, it is not fair that animals should suffer in order to achieve this. (278 words)
 

This animal testing essay would achieve a high score.
 

It fully answers all parts of the - explaining the arguments 'for' in the first paragraph and the arguments 'against' in the next. Conclusions are then drawn with the writer giving their opinion in the conclusion. It is thus very clearly organised, with each body paragraph having acentral idea.
 

Ideas are also extended and supported by the use of reasons and some examples or further clarification. No ideas are left unclear or unexplained. There is also some good topic related vocabulary in the animal testing essay such as 'life saving drugs' and 'bred' and a mix ofcomplex sentences, such as adverbial clauses:
 

'Although it may improve the lives of humans, it is not fair that animals should suffer in order to achieve this'.

Noun clauses:

'...they feel that many tests are not really important'.

And relative clauses:

'...the animals which are used are not usually wild...'

Transitions are also used effectively to ensure there is goodcoherence and cohesion. For example, 'On the other hand..' indicates a change to discuss the contrasting ideas, and 'Therefore..." and 'As a consequence..' are used to give results.